Don’t break up using social media. Changing your Facebook relationship status to “single,” or announcing to the Twittersphere that you’re on the market before you inform the person you’re dumping, is deplorable. Even after The Talk, announcing a breakup to the World Wide Web requires some sensitivity—and a little bit of time. A day for every month you were together, or a week for every year, seems fair. Dumpees, on the other hand, can update as soon as they slam the phone down. In the words of Bobby Brown, it’s their prerogative.

*Don’t break up with a Post-it. It might make for a funny episode of Sex and the City, but breaking up using any form of communication that limits your character count is reprehensible. This goes for texting as well, and there’s a special spot in hell for those who do it with txtspk.

Don’t dump someone on (or the day before) a birthday, holiday, or deadline. If this one isn’t self-explanatory, then you’ve got bigger issues.